Advice from ppl who have been divorced!?

okay my cousin who I love to death is getting a divorce from his wife of 5yrs. she cheated on him and filed for divorce before he even knew there was a problem. Well he's always been a little unstable (alot of issues that stemmed from childhood) Well i went to see him last night and he is so depressed! He's already signed up to go to the marines and will have a court date to decide at the end of Feb. He is making a huge mistake and just doesnt care anymore! I've tried everything I can think of to make him feel a little better but it hasnt worked! I know its normal to be devastated, but I really want to help him before its too late! Any advice from someone whos been there? I love my cousin and I dont want to lose him!!


Thanks in advance!!Advice from ppl who have been divorced!?
First of all.....let him know he is not alone. If I had a dime for everyone who has suffered like he is I would be rich. Even now I met two people on this site alone that are as depressed as he is for the same reason. Tell him that he may not see it now but EVERYTHING turns around. His wife is not going to where the grass is greener and he will be watching things fall apart for her very soon. So many people feel they were left on the wayside for their spouse to have some wonderful life with the new partner. It rarely happens....statistics prove it. Tell him to not be making any huge decisions now, go to a therapist and get some Wellbutrin or Lexapro or an anti-depressent to pull him through the tough times, stay busy and on a schedule.....and just bide his time because great things are in store for him! (he can email me for advice anytime he likes.....why not everyone else does...LOL)Advice from ppl who have been divorced!?
A lot of time men who have been blind sided by the loss of a marriage want to do drastic things just to get away. He is a grown man, if he wants to become a marine you should not try to stop him.





who are you to say it is a mistake. If its a mistake then he will have to find out for him self.
I don't see how enlisting in the Marines can be a mistake. It takes a lot of courage to do so, and he should be commended and respected for doing so.


If he is in fact running away from things, there is nothing you can do to stop him. He was hurt, he probably needs time away from everyone, and everything (including family, friends, etc) to heal. Just because he enlists does not mean you'll lose him.


Support him, no matter your feelings. Give him his space and let him know you're there for him whenever he needs you.
Find out who the recruiter is and send them a registered letter stating that your cousin is mentally unstable and was not of sound mind when he enlisted. Death by military, eh? If you are in Florida, you may be able to have him Baker Acted, as he would benefit from checking into a residential psychiatric facility for treatment of post-marital depression. Only counseling and medication will help him snap out of it. To be honest, his parents and siblings should be taking the ball here, but if they can't or won't, it's admirable that you are.

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