I just kicked my husband out and will be filing for divorce. I'm having a hard enough time keeping myself together right now but I'm doing it for our five year old daughter. She however is mad at me because I kicked daddy out and is crying. I'm at a loss as to how to help her and it's only making it worse on me. I can handle me, and I can handle this extra of her being heart broken, but I feel like I should somehow be able to say something to help her.
I don't need anyones crap about making my marriage work because trust me when I say I wish that were possible, but it's not and I've tried and tried and tried... but marriages don't work when only one person is trying... so please save your crap for someone who doesn't have a logical reason for it.Any advice on supporting a five year old through divorce?
Well, my sympathies for the unfortunate situation. I am a single dad myself, so I have walked in your shoes. I agree that some marriages just will not work out, no matter what. If your ex-husband intends to stay an active part of your children's life, then you can reassure your daughter that way. Let her know that mommy and daddy still love her and always will. It will be tough on her knowing that daddy doesn't live there anymore, but she will adapt.
I have joint custody with my ex, and I cannot suffer a deadbeat dad. Hopefully, your ex will do the right thing and not just pay child support. You are doing everything you can. You are there, being a mom. How this will affect your daughter really depends on her and your ex.
You are doing your best and that is more than what is expected.Any advice on supporting a five year old through divorce?
People CRAP is exactly what you do need. Your going to be joining the millions of VERY unhappy single parent women out there. A woman with a child is NOT going to attract a better man then what you have now, or had. Hell I have no idea of the circumstances here but I can tell you this EVERYONE has it in them to make anything work.
Fact the world seems to happily ignore is children that do not grow up in a house WITH a father are ALWAYS messed up in the head about men.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Husband has filed for a divorce, he kicked me and my kids out. he owned the house B4 we married. ANY ADVICE?
married 6yrs; 5 kids 2 youngest are my present husbands.Husband has filed for a divorce, he kicked me and my kids out. he owned the house B4 we married. ANY ADVICE?
Where in the world do you live? I have never heard of a man being able to kick a wife and 3 children out of their home. Have you talked to a lawyer, are any of your children also his biological children, if not you could have problems, bless the little children who have to go through emotional pain caused by care less adults.
BlublaHusband has filed for a divorce, he kicked me and my kids out. he owned the house B4 we married. ANY ADVICE?
well if you were cheating on your husdand than you could try and talk it over with him if hes cheating on you than i guess that it is a very big risk!! But if you have kids than tell him to think about the kids and tell him to think about how they will act or be like when they grow up without a father let him think about that before getting divorced i think that the top first thing is kids!!
Talk to a lawyer. If you can't afford one, there are usually some services (Legal Aid, etc.) who can provide legal services for the destitute.
You undoubtedly have some rights in this case, but what they are will vary depending on which state you live in, and the circumstances of why he's divorcing you.
Maybe it wasn't meant for you to marry him. He probably was seeing someone else anyway.Take him to court if you didn't sign a cerain paper you will get the house and he would have to take care of you and your children no matter what. Put himn on child support also
Where in the world do you live? I have never heard of a man being able to kick a wife and 3 children out of their home. Have you talked to a lawyer, are any of your children also his biological children, if not you could have problems, bless the little children who have to go through emotional pain caused by care less adults.
BlublaHusband has filed for a divorce, he kicked me and my kids out. he owned the house B4 we married. ANY ADVICE?
well if you were cheating on your husdand than you could try and talk it over with him if hes cheating on you than i guess that it is a very big risk!! But if you have kids than tell him to think about the kids and tell him to think about how they will act or be like when they grow up without a father let him think about that before getting divorced i think that the top first thing is kids!!
Talk to a lawyer. If you can't afford one, there are usually some services (Legal Aid, etc.) who can provide legal services for the destitute.
You undoubtedly have some rights in this case, but what they are will vary depending on which state you live in, and the circumstances of why he's divorcing you.
Maybe it wasn't meant for you to marry him. He probably was seeing someone else anyway.Take him to court if you didn't sign a cerain paper you will get the house and he would have to take care of you and your children no matter what. Put himn on child support also
I'm getting divorced after 21 years, and have never lived on my own. Any advice?
My pregnant 16 yr old daughter will be moving with me. I have never taken care of any of the financial aspects in our marriage, nor have i ever lived on my own. I am looking for advice on what i need to prepare myself for, and how to start or even develop a budget. Will my x-husband have to pay child support for our daughter as well?
Any help is greatly appreciated.I'm getting divorced after 21 years, and have never lived on my own. Any advice?
So sorry that you have to go through this after 21 years, but do not waster any more time by looking BACK at what you had, which must not have been much. Yes, your x should pay for your 16 year old daughter, but YOU need to get a job and then you will have some respect for yourself. You need to get help if you have no skills to get a job, and social services and your lawyer will be able to give you some help in finding places that will train you for work. You are not too old to begin a career in some hospital or patient care employment, try, try to get skills so that you have a decent paycheck coming in. Make sure that your daughter knows that you will have to work harder to keep her with you, and you need her help around the house. Good luck and have courage, you will need it to go on, but you will find that you CAN make it without the bum that you have been living with. God bless.I'm getting divorced after 21 years, and have never lived on my own. Any advice?
I was in the same boat as you - same age- same years married. only difference is I always did the bills.
what I do is sort out what bills will be paid on what pay check day. and I always try to put alittle into savings for those unexpected emergencies - even if it is only $20 a month. Yes, you can get child support - she's 16- and unmarried. also, don't sign off on the tax exempt for her - keep that and don't give it to you husband. also, as far as child support goes- don't have that money that you depend on - because there might be times that you don't get it. Make sure he has to pay some of the out of pocket expenses for your daughter- and also, whoever has insurance on the child should continue to have insurance on her.
have your daughter sign up for WIC today - they will give you milk/cheese etc and once the baby arrives - you will get formula for the baby - BIG SAVINGS. and when your daughter has her baby - have her apply for child support from the father to make her life easier too -
There's help out there. I was married for almost 11 and kicked his butt out and he took every dime. We had 10 year old at the time. There's help for her too. State funded programs. Medicaid, WIC ( Women Infant Children) can make sure her and the baby are taken care of if they need it. As for child support, the lawyer and the state decide that. Im not sure since she's pregnant. You can do it if you just put your mind to it. It gets easier with time. Trust me.
All the power to you. You will have a lot on your plate and it wont be easy at first. Talk to some of your friends and get some input there. Do you work now? If you havent for awhile, Id say your soon to be ex will need to be paying alimony for at least part of the time you were married. Have you gotten legal advice?
Yes, your ex should be helping out and paying for your daughter in some way. again, ask your attorney or someone you know that has been through it.
My ideas:
1) have a checking acct
2) savings acct too
3) buy an accounting ledger book to list out your bills and finances. makes it easier to track all your bills
4) make sure you deposit a little bit at least into savings every mo no matter how painful it feels to let go of your money.
5) have your job take a small amt of money from your paycheck and automatically deposit it in your savings account.
talk to your county welfare dept for advice including the local clinic or planned parenthood for your daughter. they will have resources and connections to help you along.
good luck!
why you want to do this. it is really really bad. you people are doing a very very big mistake. never ever do this. please try to STOP it. you both are going to cry. plesae,please,i beg you to stop this and live together. your daughter is going to suffer. you are leading a nice life. you are the best example to the new people and world. dont ever do this. please live together for the glory of GOD. you just thik of your lovely daughter and live together. why you putting her in the highy way that people run up and down vehicle. God bless you to think and to live together. Pray that you may think again and live together for the sake of GOd and for your daughter.
After 21 years in a marriage you should have learned certain values and you never lose independence...it's always with you it just goes dormant.
All you have to do is wipe the dust off and crank it up and walk with one foot in front of the other and say hello to world with confidence and don't look back.
Your best days are ahead of you.
after 21 years? life sucks.....
Any help is greatly appreciated.I'm getting divorced after 21 years, and have never lived on my own. Any advice?
So sorry that you have to go through this after 21 years, but do not waster any more time by looking BACK at what you had, which must not have been much. Yes, your x should pay for your 16 year old daughter, but YOU need to get a job and then you will have some respect for yourself. You need to get help if you have no skills to get a job, and social services and your lawyer will be able to give you some help in finding places that will train you for work. You are not too old to begin a career in some hospital or patient care employment, try, try to get skills so that you have a decent paycheck coming in. Make sure that your daughter knows that you will have to work harder to keep her with you, and you need her help around the house. Good luck and have courage, you will need it to go on, but you will find that you CAN make it without the bum that you have been living with. God bless.I'm getting divorced after 21 years, and have never lived on my own. Any advice?
I was in the same boat as you - same age- same years married. only difference is I always did the bills.
what I do is sort out what bills will be paid on what pay check day. and I always try to put alittle into savings for those unexpected emergencies - even if it is only $20 a month. Yes, you can get child support - she's 16- and unmarried. also, don't sign off on the tax exempt for her - keep that and don't give it to you husband. also, as far as child support goes- don't have that money that you depend on - because there might be times that you don't get it. Make sure he has to pay some of the out of pocket expenses for your daughter- and also, whoever has insurance on the child should continue to have insurance on her.
have your daughter sign up for WIC today - they will give you milk/cheese etc and once the baby arrives - you will get formula for the baby - BIG SAVINGS. and when your daughter has her baby - have her apply for child support from the father to make her life easier too -
There's help out there. I was married for almost 11 and kicked his butt out and he took every dime. We had 10 year old at the time. There's help for her too. State funded programs. Medicaid, WIC ( Women Infant Children) can make sure her and the baby are taken care of if they need it. As for child support, the lawyer and the state decide that. Im not sure since she's pregnant. You can do it if you just put your mind to it. It gets easier with time. Trust me.
All the power to you. You will have a lot on your plate and it wont be easy at first. Talk to some of your friends and get some input there. Do you work now? If you havent for awhile, Id say your soon to be ex will need to be paying alimony for at least part of the time you were married. Have you gotten legal advice?
Yes, your ex should be helping out and paying for your daughter in some way. again, ask your attorney or someone you know that has been through it.
My ideas:
1) have a checking acct
2) savings acct too
3) buy an accounting ledger book to list out your bills and finances. makes it easier to track all your bills
4) make sure you deposit a little bit at least into savings every mo no matter how painful it feels to let go of your money.
5) have your job take a small amt of money from your paycheck and automatically deposit it in your savings account.
talk to your county welfare dept for advice including the local clinic or planned parenthood for your daughter. they will have resources and connections to help you along.
good luck!
why you want to do this. it is really really bad. you people are doing a very very big mistake. never ever do this. please try to STOP it. you both are going to cry. plesae,please,i beg you to stop this and live together. your daughter is going to suffer. you are leading a nice life. you are the best example to the new people and world. dont ever do this. please live together for the glory of GOD. you just thik of your lovely daughter and live together. why you putting her in the highy way that people run up and down vehicle. God bless you to think and to live together. Pray that you may think again and live together for the sake of GOd and for your daughter.
After 21 years in a marriage you should have learned certain values and you never lose independence...it's always with you it just goes dormant.
All you have to do is wipe the dust off and crank it up and walk with one foot in front of the other and say hello to world with confidence and don't look back.
Your best days are ahead of you.
after 21 years? life sucks.....
Anyone have advice on dating a recently-divorced friend?
We've been friends for about nine years now, and she just got divorced a few months ago. We've hung out together a few times one-on-one in the past few weeks, but never actually used the word ';date';.
Would it be appropriate to ask if she'd be interested in being more than just friends? And if so, is there a sensible way of doing so?
Thanks in advance.Anyone have advice on dating a recently-divorced friend?
well if she is allready ready then why not. you talk to her about it. and be prepared for her decisions. if she is not ready yet then respect her decisions. i now separations are not easy so just take it easy with her. and respect her feelings.Anyone have advice on dating a recently-divorced friend?
its real simple ask yourself if you really want her and care for her how bad do you want her could you live without knowing the rest of your life will you regret not trying i say go for it be a man
Would it be appropriate to ask if she'd be interested in being more than just friends? And if so, is there a sensible way of doing so?
Thanks in advance.Anyone have advice on dating a recently-divorced friend?
well if she is allready ready then why not. you talk to her about it. and be prepared for her decisions. if she is not ready yet then respect her decisions. i now separations are not easy so just take it easy with her. and respect her feelings.Anyone have advice on dating a recently-divorced friend?
its real simple ask yourself if you really want her and care for her how bad do you want her could you live without knowing the rest of your life will you regret not trying i say go for it be a man
Need advice about dating men going through a divorce..?
I was against this idea for a very long time until I met him. I realized that he's a real nice, sincere and genuine guy. His ex cheated on him and he has a 3 yr old daughter with her whom he hardly see. We've known each other for almost a year now. I learned a lot of life lessons since I've known him. I also had a glimpse into his soul and have this deep knowing that he is the one.
For those who has or is dating someone going through a divorce, what are your challenges? If you could do it all over again, would you date someone who is going through a divorce? What very important lessons have you learned and how has it transformed your life? What helpful advice would you share to those who are new in dating someone who is divorced/going through a divorce?
Do men going through a divorce eventually starts believing in serious relationships and a second chance for a happy marriage again eventually? What advice could you share. Thanks.Need advice about dating men going through a divorce..?
he might change and go back to his wife
can stop the divorce proceedings at any time
better off if he gets divorced
some might not want to get married again
he is afraid of being cheated on again
could want to be single for the rest of his life
don't want to have to go through divorce againlips
For those who has or is dating someone going through a divorce, what are your challenges? If you could do it all over again, would you date someone who is going through a divorce? What very important lessons have you learned and how has it transformed your life? What helpful advice would you share to those who are new in dating someone who is divorced/going through a divorce?
Do men going through a divorce eventually starts believing in serious relationships and a second chance for a happy marriage again eventually? What advice could you share. Thanks.Need advice about dating men going through a divorce..?
he might change and go back to his wife
can stop the divorce proceedings at any time
better off if he gets divorced
some might not want to get married again
he is afraid of being cheated on again
could want to be single for the rest of his life
don't want to have to go through divorce again
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Need advice/help with getting a legal separation/divorce in Stafford, VA?
I am separated from my so-to-be ex-husband. We do not have any kids or property together. We were married for about a year and a half. We have also worked out all of our bills and accounts we had together, so we don鈥檛 have any finical ties. We separated on July 1, 08. My dilemma is that I can simply not afford a lawyer right now and I make to much money to get any type of legal help from county/state. I have found a web site were I can buy all the paper work and information that I need for a divorce in VA. I can buy that package for a little over $50, and do the whole thing myself. One of my questions is that we have to be separated for 6 months; does that time start from our legal separation or do we get the time from when we actually separated (July 1)? Second questions; how does the whole process work (step-by-step)? Third; any additional advice or your stories of divorce would be helpful.Need advice/help with getting a legal separation/divorce in Stafford, VA?
The separation starts from the day he left the home. That is your separation date. Believe me I am going through a divorce in VA as well. I am still learning the process and wish I could help you more.Need advice/help with getting a legal separation/divorce in Stafford, VA?
why dont you get an uncontested divorce? what is it that you are looking for, alimony? If you dont have enough money for a lawyer, look for one that does pro-bono work. In some cases they will do it for no fee, particularly in cases of abuse. If you are separated for over a year, you can get a divorce on grounds of abandonment. But your divorce has to have a reason, or grounds for filing.
I was in your situation, but we have a child together. You might not have to buy those papers for $50. Check your county website to see if there is any paperwork for dual fault or no fault divorce. Once you have the paperwork filled out %26amp; notarized, you go to the county so they can file it %26amp; you'll have to pay court fees (in Illinois, it was $270). From there, you will probably get a court date to go before the judge so he can approve it. That's how it worked for me.
ask a lawyer.....or some 1 that knows not here.
The separation starts from the day he left the home. That is your separation date. Believe me I am going through a divorce in VA as well. I am still learning the process and wish I could help you more.Need advice/help with getting a legal separation/divorce in Stafford, VA?
why dont you get an uncontested divorce? what is it that you are looking for, alimony? If you dont have enough money for a lawyer, look for one that does pro-bono work. In some cases they will do it for no fee, particularly in cases of abuse. If you are separated for over a year, you can get a divorce on grounds of abandonment. But your divorce has to have a reason, or grounds for filing.
I was in your situation, but we have a child together. You might not have to buy those papers for $50. Check your county website to see if there is any paperwork for dual fault or no fault divorce. Once you have the paperwork filled out %26amp; notarized, you go to the county so they can file it %26amp; you'll have to pay court fees (in Illinois, it was $270). From there, you will probably get a court date to go before the judge so he can approve it. That's how it worked for me.
ask a lawyer.....or some 1 that knows not here.
Thinking it may be best to file for divorce but I am scared, I need advice and support.?
5 years ago my husband had an affair. We had problems and I am not going to blame it all on him I don't communicate it's hard for me. After the incident we tried for a while but 3.5 years later we separated and have been living apart ever since. We see eachother and tried to spend time as a family with the kids 3 times a year and in that time we rekindled our relationship. In this time I have come to the realization that I was in an emotionally abusive relationship and continue to work to break the patterns. As I have changed he has become different, not openly aggressive but not kind and no longer cares to ask how my day was, or how we're doing. For the first time in 2 years I feel like a single parent. I feel so dissapointed because I did everything in my power to save this marriage but I don't think I will ever feel safe at his side. I am afraid my marriage will always be a battlefield and I don't want to live that way or have my kids in that situation.Thinking it may be best to file for divorce but I am scared, I need advice and support.?
Well it sounds like u have already made up ur mind. What r u scared of starting all over? being alone? well if i were u I would get some time alone and talk to him tell him how u feel but give him an option to change it. Cuz it sounds like u still love him and u really dont want it to be over but u just cant live with the way things r right now. Communition is the key to ANY relationship! remember that.Thinking it may be best to file for divorce but I am scared, I need advice and support.?
Divorce is never the best option so you could always discuss things with your spouse and maybe a counslor to get things worked out
Couples counseling. Have somebody help the two of you. If not to put the relationship back together then to help you end it and to help you do right by your children. Think twice before you abandon the relationship though. Go see a counselor.
get out before you waste any more time and energy in a no win situation. at least you tried to make it work.
Well it sounds like u have already made up ur mind. What r u scared of starting all over? being alone? well if i were u I would get some time alone and talk to him tell him how u feel but give him an option to change it. Cuz it sounds like u still love him and u really dont want it to be over but u just cant live with the way things r right now. Communition is the key to ANY relationship! remember that.Thinking it may be best to file for divorce but I am scared, I need advice and support.?
Divorce is never the best option so you could always discuss things with your spouse and maybe a counslor to get things worked out
Couples counseling. Have somebody help the two of you. If not to put the relationship back together then to help you end it and to help you do right by your children. Think twice before you abandon the relationship though. Go see a counselor.
get out before you waste any more time and energy in a no win situation. at least you tried to make it work.
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